Saturday, April 20, 2024

50 Shades Of Black: A Fictitious Exotic Journey For “The Best Part”

September 6, 2018 by  
Filed under Highlights

Meet Zena and Maximus

One man, one woman, one destiny. Before they meet, take a journey into their inner dialogue.


If one more person asks me how to spell my name, I am going to go off. Maybe he didn’t hear me. I don’t know why I always sit by people who want to have a conversation on the bus. “I SAID MY NAME IS ZENA. IT’S SPELLED Z-E-N-A!”

Maybe that was a little too loud (chuckle). Looking like my Uncle Ray. I guess that’s why I am talking to him. How many stops does this bus have to take? It’s so hot in here, I hope my hair doesn’t go back before my interview. Lord, these stockings are making matters worse — and I can’t wait to take them off. But they’re essential in holding me all together. I know I shouldn’t have eaten so late last night.

“Yes, I am sorry, what did you say? No this is not my stop — mine should be the next one. It was nice talking to you too.”

He was a nice man and he wasn’t trying to mack. Finally! I hate these shoes and I hope the light changes soon. One more block and I will go straight to the bathroom and get myself together.

“Thank you!” I must be looking good for doors to be held open for me. Still have to make that stop and wipe my face. “Yes, what floor is human resources? Okay, thank you.”

Wow, this is a nice elevator and some people seem to be smiling. “Yes, can you please push number 4?” I am here to see Mr. Spoon. Yes, I would like a bottle of water. Thank you.”

Forbes Magazine, Time Magazine, and Good Housekeeping. I know that is not potato salad. I should submit my mother’s potato salad recipe and let Good Housekeeping know how it’s really done. I should be called soon — my appointment was almost fifteen minutes ago. Should I ask what’s taking so long?

“Yes, I am right here.” Wow! This white man is fine, but I am going to keep it professional. So many questions. I hope he likes me. I just have to relax. My resume is on point, because my auntie helped me. I know he likes it. “Yes, I am ready for the opportunity to work for your company.” Entry level is good, just need to get this job. Should I ask about the pay? No, maybe not. Keep smiling. I hope I don’t have lipstick on my teeth. No, I’m straight.

“Do you know when I might hear back from you?” Now, this will tell me if he likes me or not. “Thank you for your time, Mr. Spoon. Okay, Greg.” She ready! (laughs)

I hope I can catch my bus. I might have to take these heels off to walk back to the bus stop. You almost hit me. He wasn’t even looking. Now, he is looking, huh.


I am always delayed for some reason. These crazy people better watch where they are going. Traffic is getting bad. If someone hits my new BMW I will be on the news.

I should have taken off my jacket before getting into my car. So hot today. My air conditioning is starting to kick in. Hey, don’t honk at me. Light changed so fast. I have to put my phone down, but I want to see if Ms. Beautiful Lips liked my recent post. I swear that sistah has the most beautiful lips. Like two plump strawberries. I wonder how they taste.

I did get a like when I posted my full name, Maximus. My mother hates it when people call me Max. I am so crazy, I don’t even know that lady…what if she’s not a SHE? (Laughter) Never know these days.

(SCREECH!) Where did she come from? Wow! She almost made me hit her. Why is she walking so fast with no shoes? But she is fine. I have been single for way too long. If I get off in time I will go to the gym. Yeah, I’m still looking. I like a sistah with a hustle. I wonder what side of town she is going to.

“Hey Shelly, any messages? I worked on the Powerpoint for the new ad campaign last night, and I know the client will love it. I think (laughs)? From your mouth to their ears. Yes, I have lost a few pounds. Staying in the gym and basketball on weekends helps. I try to get to the gym at least 4 times a week, but tonight it looks like a long one. Order a salad for lunch and I will eat at my desk.

“Thank you Shelly. You always take care of me. Who? Tell her I’m out. If she wasn’t a doctor I would try to find her one. Yes, this is why I am single. Call Dan Patrick and tell him we can meet next week to go over the new ad campaign’ budget, thank you.”

Finally, I can turn my music up. I think everyone has gone home for the night. I love me some Donny Hathaway. My mother always said I was an old soul. But a little Drake now and then don’t hurt. Let me get out of here and pick up some tacos to take home if they are still open. If not, maybe I will make me an egg white omelet and take my butt to bed.

Maybe I will call the doctor for a little physical tonight. Naw, I will take my ass to bed.

Want more Zena and Maximus? The story continues in the September 2018 edition of Las Vegas Black Image Magazine.

Speak Your Mind

Tell us what you're thinking...
and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!

Comment moderation is in use. Please do not submit your comment twice -- it will appear shortly.